Sunday, April 3, 2011

A sigh but not a breath of fresh air

   I look outside, gray clouds fill the sky. What am I looking for when I sit, staring blankly out the window. Am I looking for someone to take away the sorrow that fills my heart. The confusion I feel as my life crumbles around me. It will get better. People promise. What if it doesn't? What if the truth that everyone seeks from me isn't the truth at all. What if I'm happy with the way that life is crumbling down around me. It's the first time that I had some control over what happens in my life.

  The rain falls, it makes me feel like its about time that I can let the tears fall from my eyes. You know, the tears that I wouldn't allow to fall because it shows weakness at a time when I'm supposed to feel empowered. I am empowered though, what's the big deal with a release anyway. Staring blankly out, not seeing anything but feeling. Feeling the loneliness but liberation of taking my life back. Should I shed a tear...no it's not necessary. My life no longer needs the tears of the past to bring me forward. I will not be moved and I will not cry. Separation has liberated my inner most soul.

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